her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize