Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
