i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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