I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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