i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
That reminds me...we need to get swords
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
