Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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