I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I'm always down for nudity.
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