smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
she pinky promised me she was 18
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
