Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Cover your peen. We're going out.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
