i barfeds in our rink
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize