kristin has been a bad kristin
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
