I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Randomize
