sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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