therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Randomize
