then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
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