If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
