But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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