just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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