a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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