I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Randomize
