He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
