absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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