If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
