i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
