Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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