Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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