I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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