That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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