My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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