I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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