this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
