so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
