Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize