Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
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