atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
