She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
