The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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