Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
