Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
