no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
