finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
