11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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