the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize