I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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