i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
