What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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