Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
