I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Randomize
