weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
