So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Randomize
